Submission: Two Female Protagonists Reexamine Familiar Heteronormative Power Dynamics
Two contemporary short stories, “Cat Person” by Kristen Roupenian and “The Husband Stitch” by Carmen Maria Machado, examine how a woman’s authentic identity can be compromised by the men around them. Both stories depict men as an obstacle in each narrator’s road to building and maintaining an authentic identity, due to predetermined notions of self-definition that ultimately lead to a prioritization of a man’s desires over one’s own.
Both stories demonstrate a conscious decision on the part of the female protagonists to comply with, and perpetuate, stereotypical power dynamics. In “Cat Person,” Margot constantly switches focus between herself and Robert. For instance, she mentions she is starting to understand Robert, “…how sensitive he was, how easily he could be wounded—and that made her feel closer to him, and also powerful, because once she knew how to hurt him she also knew how he could be soothed”(12).
Margot acquires this particular sense of power by nurturing; she feels superior knowing that even though Robert is older, he is still vulnerable, and Margot, despite being younger, caters to his sensitivities by refraining from subjects that could make him seem emotionally weak. Furthermore, Margot switches the power dynamics sexually. When intimate, she observes how Robert “looked stunned and stupid with pleasure, like a milk-drunk baby,” and reevaluate her motives, thinking that, “maybe this was what she loved most about sex—a guy revealed like that” (16).
Margot relishes Robert showing her his need—his desire for a girl so young and with a body so flawless empowers her. However, despite the fact that she achieves superiority in certain instances, Margot ultimately diminishes part of her identity by working to please Robert. This becomes clear when Margot shows any sign of vulnerability, such as crying. After being denied entry to a bar due to her young age, Margot feels as though she ruined their night out. She can feel tears sting her eyes, but “when Robert saw her face crumpling, a kind of magic happened. All the tension drained out of his posture; he stood up straight and wrapped his bearlike arms around her” (10). Robert jumps at the opportunity to show strength—his posture suddenly straightens, a sign of stability and confidence. Describing his arms as “bearlike” further underscores the power differential, and helps the reader visualize the comparison between Robert as a big, strong person encompassing Margot, a delicate, precious thing in his arms. She even goes on to say that Robert “became much more relaxed” that night probably because she had cried. In other words, Margot has found what puts him at ease, and what brings out his best mood: when she displays vulnerability.
Margot asks Robert many questions about the movies he likes, and speaks self-deprecatingly about the movies at the artsy theatre that she found boring or incomprehensible; she told him about how much her older co-workers intimidated her, and how she sometimes worried that she wasn’t smart enough to form her own opinions on anything. “The effect of this on him was palpable and immediate, and she felt as if she were petting a large, skittish animal, like a horse or a bear, skillfully coaxing it to eat from her hand.” (12)
Eventually, Margot learns that degrading herself is the way to winning Robert’s heart. The narrator employs words like “self deprecatingly,”“incomprehensible,” and “intimidated” to describe Margot’s efforts to seem inferior to Robert. Whether this self-degradation is artifice or not, Margot consciously chooses it in pursuit of a man’s acceptance and affection, thus placing her own identity in jeopardy.
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Similarly in Machado’s “The Husband Stitch,” the narrator initially appears confident in her sexual desires, which in turn gives her a sense of power. She acknowledges that “it is not normal that a girl teaches her boy, but I am only showing him what I want, what plays on the insides of my eyelids as I fall asleep. He comes to know the flicker of my expression as a desire passes through me, and I hold nothing back from him”(9). She understands well that she has shifted the expected power dynamics; she is now teaching her man what she desires.
However, the language used to describe her other sexual encounters calls her powerful identity into question. One specific example describes the position she is in when performing a sexual act: “…on my hands and knees offer[ing] myself up to him” (7). In several other instances: “He becomes hard, and I tell him that I want him to use my body as he sees fit” (11). The narrator is handing over her authority, and her awareness of what she might want within a sexual encounter, sacrificing the power she has over her body. This happens quite often: “When he comes home each day, my husband has made a list in his mind of things he desires from me, and I am willing to provide them and more…” (14). Submissiveness from a woman is seen as attractive, and desired—rather than maintaining an authentic identity that is not guided by stereotypes, the narrator gives in to once customary expectations. According to the Journal of Sex Research, “Sexual script theory suggests that the majority of sexual behaviors in heterosexual relationships tend to follow a prescribed social script that reflects the cultural norm… [in which] heterosexual women are expected to take on the ‘complementary’ submissive role during sexual activity, which entails submitting to their partner’s desires and waiting for their partner to initiate and direct” (Sanchez 169). The narrator might feel that deviation from gender-role scripts will lead to disapproval and rejection from her husband and thus feels subconsciously pressured to adhere to these stereotypes. Nonetheless, complying with these submissive roles relinquishes her agency, control, and ultimately her identity.
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Both protagonists compromise their sense of identity by prioritizing a man’s needs over their own. Margot is moments away from having sex with Robert when she begins to reconsider her decision, “Looking at him like that, so awkwardly bent, his belly thick and soft and covered with hair, Margot recoiled. But the thought of what it would take to stop what she had set in motion was overwhelming; it would require an amount of tact and gentleness that she felt was impossible to summon. It wasn’t that she was scared he would try to force her to do something against her will but that insisting that they stop now, after everything she’d done to push this forward, would make her seem spoiled and capricious, as if she’d ordered something at a restaurant and then, once the food arrived, and changed her mind and sent it back” (15).
Rather than stopping, Margot pauses to consider how “spoiled and capricious” it would make her appear to not carry on with it. She pushes herself to have sex with Robert though she is no longer in the mood, because she prioritizes his feelings, and her image. Likewise, the narrator in “The Husband Stitch” she gives up the only part of herself she has left, the only thing that she can call her own: the tied ribbon around her neck. Throughout the story, her husband angles to get a hold of the green ribbon around her neck, despite the countless times she denies his request. He manipulates her by saying a wife should not have any secrets from her husband, to which she replies: “The ribbon is not a secret; its just mine… I’ve given you everything you have ever asked for…Am I not allowed this one thing?” (20-21). The mere fact that she has to ask her husband to keep something, which belongs to her, illustrates the strength of the husband’s hold on her. Unfortunately, his influence prove stronger, and she allows him to take her ribbon off, knowing this will lead to her death. These women exemplify a sad truth—many women internalize the notion that they must think of a man’s needs before their own, regardless of how it impacts their identity.
“Cat Person” and “The Husband Stitch” help create an understanding of why a society geared toward a man’s benefit hinders a woman’s ability to safeguard her inherently powerful self. The authors suggest that a woman should not let any man hold any authority over her body or her actions, because once that authority is handed over to someone else, a woman can ultimately lose herself.
